A wicked man listens to evil lips; a liar pays attention to a malicious tongue (Proverbs 17:4).

I feel incredibly awkward when someone starts talking foolishly.  What am I really supposed to say when someone is gushing on and on about how much peace they get from blending a little bit of Buddhism with a little bit of Christianity with a little bit of Paganism to create their own little "salad-bar religion?"  Or what if someone starts excitedly prattling about their plans for the weekend to "go out and get some pussy" or get high and rave the night away?  Or what if I'm someone starts complaining to me about his wife, seemingly sharing it in the sense of answering the question "How are you doing?" but basically gossiping and creating some extremely awkward relational dynamics?  Am I really supposed to denounce such instances as sin or heresy, right there on the spot?  Would it really be best for me to frown about someone else's morality or openly castigate the other person for their ungodly choices?  Of course it feels odd to put on a plastic smile and nod along with whatever drivel the other person is pouring forth.  But I would say it feels equally odd -- and often even more awkward -- to make a big scene about it.  It feels rude to walk away from a conversation, no matter how base the subject of the dialogue might be.  It feels mean to interrupt someone and ask for an immediate change of subject.  I confess that I often respond to such awkward situations in a passive way.

Proverbs 17:4 helps me to consider such situations in a different light.  It helps me to see that, in these awkward circumstances, my passivity can not only create a situation in which I become a witness to sin and folly -- but also an accomplice.

When lips turn evil and tongues turn malicious, it's not only the talker who becomes culpable, but also the listener.  That is, when I passively listen to someone running their mouth, I become the "wicked man" of Proverbs 17:4.  Even if I don't open my mouth (but do allow my ears to stay open), I become the "liar."  These are challenging statements to consider, yet as I think about them I realize that they are true.  Ultimately, the only difference between sinful thoughts and sinful words is that the words open up the possibility of infecting a second person.  And the only way that a second (or third, or fourth) person can be affected -- multiplying the power and effect of the sin -- is if those words are received, uncontested, and digested.  When I listen to words of sin and folly without offering any correction or protest, I make myself complicit to their downfall and susceptible to the freshly-sown seeds of my own sin.

I really have to wonder what I'm afraid of, when someone's running his mouth and an awkward situation presents itself.  Is etiquette really more important than righteousness?  And besides, if I ever become convinced that I really need to check out of the conversation, do I have to do it in a rude way?  Would it really come across as mean or judgmental if I said, "Hey, umm... Could we maybe change the subject please?"  Or "So how 'bout them Lakers?"  Or "To be honest, I'm not sure I can really agree with all your sentiments.  I don't want to come across as judgmental or anything like that, and I'd be more than willing to explain my reasoning if you'd like, but maybe we'd just do better to talk about something else..."  If said smilingly, with a warm and accepting tone, would these really need to be considered moralistic crusading?

Or could they just be a helpful check to keep both me and the other person in the conversation out of trouble?