A gift opens the way for the giver and ushers him into the presence of the great (Proverbs 18:16).

I used to have a strict "anti-schmoozing" policy.  I didn't want to be one of those weaselly people who gained favor with others through flattery or gift-giving.  I didn't want to get anywhere close to accommodating any kind of perceived corruption, smoothing things over  with financial renumeration or favors.  Instead, I wanted to stand on my own integrity.  I wanted to be fair and honest, and if people could live with that:  good.  And if people could not live with that:  I was better off not doing business with them anyway, right?

Then I moved to the Netherlands.

I guess you could say that the move to the Netherlands "corrupted" me (you could probably say this in more ways than one).  Or, perhaps, it's better to say that the move to the Netherlands cultured me and gave me tools for examining the world through a perspective different than my natural one.  For instance:  when visiting one's home, say for dinner, it's considered just plain rude and unfriendly for a guest to arrive empty-handed.  You always start the evening with a gift.  It could be flowers or wine.  Or it could be a more personal gift:  maybe toys for the children, or many some kind of item for the kitchen.  The substance of the gift is less important than the fact that a gift is given.  And this is in no way considered "schmoozing."  It's simply friendliness and good manners and "gezelligheid."  So because of the fact that I am a foreigner in the Netherlands, I learned how to suspend my own notions of "integrity" -- just as I could suspend my own notions of language or diet -- and embrace another, different view of gift-giving, ultimately coming to the biblical view that "a gift opens the way for the giver and ushers him into the presence of the great."

Many of the situations that I might have once presumed to be "schmoozing" could simply be opportunities for practicing generosity.  And God is all about generosity.  It's a way of growing in the character of God.  And if it happens to open the door into relationships, business opportunities, and all other manner of situations, then so much the better.  I still don't know if I could go as far as flat-out bribing (though there are some Proverbs that might even make me wonder about this one!).  But tipping well, paying well-placed compliments, and arriving at an appointment with a thoughtfully considered gift... Why not?