The wise in heart are called discerning, and pleasant words promote instruction (Proverbs 16:21).

"I'm going to destroy you."

That's all he said:  "I'm going to destroy you."  No explanation was provided.  No particular cause was mentioned.  It was just an angry black thunderhead of a threat, hanging over all the day's activities.  "I'm going to destroy you."

What was particularly odd, though, was the fact that this Angry Black Thunderhead had been one of my kid's closest friends from the previous year of school.  They were the only two boys in their age group (due to the recent establishment of another school just a block away and some neighborhood politics which had resulted in several families switching schools), so the boys' friendship was perhaps inevitable -- but nevertheless enjoyable.  They played soccer together at recess.  They chased the girls around the playground, and they ran away from the girls on the playground.  They worked on class projects together.  They were friends.

Yet after a single summer vacation and just one week of being back in school again, he was all Angry Black Thunderhead and "I'm going to destroy you."

How was I supposed to advise my son?  Should he stand up for himself and be prepared to defend himself?  Should he tell his teacher to keep a close eye on the potential trouble-maker?  Should he try to avoid the Angry Black Thunderhead as much as possible?  Or could there be something else?

As we started to dig deeper into the situation, it appeared that the aggressive behavior may have been motivated by feelings of loneliness, isolation, and jealousy -- more than any sort of inherrent desire to "destroy" anyone.  As it turned out, another boy had enrolled over the summer -- a boy who happened to share a lot of interests with my boy.  So of course, the two of them became very close friends over the course of the first week of school.  They played together at recess.  They talked about traveling experiences from over the summer.  They worked on class projects together.  They became friends -- and guess who got left out in the process (albeit unintentionally)?  The Angry Black Thunderhead.

Of course, his technique for trying to bully his way back into the situation was not incredibly wise or mature.  But then again, he's a pre-pubescent boy!  But as the scenario started unfolding -- and it seemed like the Angry Black Thunderhead's motivations might actually be more in the direction of wanting to be friends than wanting to be enemies -- then it became apparent that the situation would only be made worse by bucking up and locking antlers with the Angry Black Thunderhead.  But if assurances of friendship and goodwill could be made, and if deliberate attempts at inclusion could be devised, then maybe things could be peacefully-yet-effectively resolved.

So equipped with a discerning heart and pleasant words, peace offerings were made -- and accepted.  The threats of destruction diminished immediately, and everyone lived happily ever after under sunny skies of peace and understanding... at least for the time being. :-)