A quick-tempered man does foolish things; and a crafty man is hated (Proverbs 14:17).

Don't you just hate it when someone erupts on you -- spewing caustic emotional lava all over the place and spouting a cloud of relational ash that hangs over your relationships for days and weeks following the eruption?  It's destructive.  It's painful.  Every little rumbling undermines the development of trust.  And even though we can try to mitigate the collateral damage with explanations, apologies, and allowances for "crimes of passion," the truth is that nobody really wants to be around when these explosions happen.  Because the fact of the matter is that a quick-tempered man does foolish things.  A lack of self-control is dangerous.  Someone with anger management issues poses a serious problem.

But is it really any better to be stuck with someone who knows how to really manage their anger -- controlling it and channeling it towards more subtle, subversive ways of outing their emotions?  I don't want that either!  Nothing gets under my skin quite like passive-aggressive positioning.  And when you've observed, over time, that a person tends to play the role of a schemer and a saboteur, it's hard to feel safe with such a person under any circumstances.  Every facial expression seems to betray critical thoughts.  Every question feels like a challenge.  It's uncomfortable.  And even though its effects are not as immediately evident, this kind of sneaky style of anger management is every bit as destructive as the quick-tempered volcanic eruptions.  Because the fact of the matter is that a crafty man is hated just as much as a quick-tempered man is despised for his folly.

So what is the solution?!?  Emotional explosion is not good, but neither is calculated and controlled release of angry emotions.  So what am I supposed to do when I get angry?!?  It can feel like an impossible situation!  Therefore, one of the most interesting outcomes of meditating on Proverbs 14:17 is the realization of the urgent need for dealing with anger in healthy, constructive ways -- practicing the spiritual discipline of forgiveness and rigorously committing ourselves to biblical conflict management.  If we don't deal with our anger, we doom ourselves to folly and hatred -- whether it slowly seeps out or it explodes suddenly.  But if we can deal with our anger in a wise and healthy way, allowing it to dissipate in godly, life-giving prayer and communication, then we can avoid foolish things and hateful relationships.  And that sounds pretty good, doesn't it?